Let's Get Bonesy
by Nobody'sNormalKitten11
Summary: Lily shocks everyone by throw her son into a deep hole. They'll be even more shocked when they find out what happened to him! Papyrus x Sans x Harry Yaoi warning and I guess a skeleton sex warning as well... :P
1. Prolouge

Hello! I've recently became hooked on Undertale so I had to make a crossover.  
Summary: Lily does the unthinkable after hearing that Voldemort was after her son. She turns him into a monster.  
Pairing: Papyrus x Sans x Harry (I'M GONNA MAKE IT WORK, DAMMIT! SANS X PAPYRUS IS MY LIFE NOW!)  
I hope you enjoy!  
HPSPHPS

Lily ran. She didn't care what her husband said. What Dumblefuck said. She refused to let it happen. To let Fate send her son's life spiraling down to hell. Fuck. That.  
So, what was Lily gonna do? Running will result in being caught. Hiding will result in being found. She thought long and hard. Then she remembered a voice.  
"Well, if you need anything, and I mean anything, just find a dark cave with a seemingly endless hole. There are many opening to our world. It's the least I could do to repay you…"  
And that what Lily did. After scribbling a note and wrapping her baby in the softest and fluffiest blanket she could conjure she set off to find the cave. She looked in every cave she saw, but none had a hole deep enough. After hours on end of looking, the sun began to rise. Her husband would be up soon. If he saw her and the baby gone, he'd contact Dumbledore, who would find them and drag them back. She couldn't afford to give up.  
Finally, she came across a cave in a mountain. She felt a strong magic in it. Relief flooded all of her emotions. She couldn't stop herself from running into the cave. She ran for abut half an hour before she halted. In front of her was a huge, gaping hole. It seemed endless, just like her old friend had said. She couldn't think of anything else to do, so she yelled down into it, praying to be heard. "Toriel! It's me, Lily! Please, I need your help! A prophecy has cursed my son, and I can't let it ruin his future! Make him yours, or anyone's! Just make this burden invalid!" She stood, waiting for a response, but nearby cracks of apparation were heard, and she couldn't stay long. She looked downed at Harry. He was still sleeping peacefully, unaware of what was happening around him. 'He'll survive…' Lily thought, hugging her son close and kissing his forehead. 'He'll survive…'  
"Mommy loves you… She always will…" Lily told him. Just as she heard footsteps coming closer, she threw Harry down the hole. "Goodbye!" She yelled down. Without even looking at the shocked faces behind her she apparated. No need to stay there any longer then she had to.


	2. Prolouge: Part 2

Hi again! I'm REALLY speechless on the amount of views this stories has in about a day. It even has favorites and follows! I have some new followers as well. Thank you everyone, it really means a lot and it gives me confidence in this story! Thanks for the reviews too! :D

Enough of the notes, though. I believe you came here to read a story. Enjoy!

 **Bold=Letter**  
HPSPHPS

Papyrus stared at the bundle of blankets laying peacefully in the snow. Why wouldn't he? Not every day you see a baby abandoned, laying on the ground crying. He didn't care that it was crying however. He cared that it was human!

"YES!" He shouted in triumphant, doing a little victory dance. "AFTER ALL THIS TIME! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE FINALLY FOUND A HUMAN!" He scooped up the baby and ran off to show his brother. Harry stopped crying and stared at him. He then started giggling. Papyrus looked down at him and smiled. He couldn't help it, Harry was just so adorable. He arrived at their house in record time. He threw the door open and screamed at the top of his nonexistent lungs, "BROTHER! I HAVE FOUND A HUMAN!"

"Pfft, yeah ri-..." Sans turned his head around and looked at Papyrus. He gaze felled onto the baby. "Where did you find it?" He asked. "IT WAS JUST LAYING IN THE SNOW! I WONDER IF SOMEONE LEFT IT THERE." Sans rushed over to his brother and took the baby. He fumbled with the blankets until he came across an envelope. "'To future guardians of my/your child'?" Sans read. "FUTURE GUARDIANS? DID SOMEONE EXPECT SOMEONE ELSE TO PICK UP THEIR CHILD AND-" Sans tuned him out and opened the envelope. Inside was a letter and what seemed to be a recipe. The letter read:

 **Dear Future Guardians of This Child,**

 **I am his mother, Lily Potter nee' Evans. Or, at least I used to be. The child's name is Hadrian James Potter, or Harry for short.**

 **You may be wondering why I gave up my child. It was because of a prophecy. It said that my son was born to defeat an evil dark wizard that would mark him as his equal, and that they both have to kill each other in order for one to win. I don't want this life for him. He'll know nothing but battle if he gets prepared for this. So I searched for options.**

 **I remembered a good friend of mine, Toriel, who lives behind that door at the end of Snowdin. She promised to do anything for me for saving her. So I gave her Harry and told her to take away his humanity. I didn't care what she used.**

 **I know that she gave him away to someone else, so please just follow the instructions.**

 **Sincerely,**

 **Lily**

Sans gave the letter to Papyrus. He looked over the other paper. It was instructions from a ritual. "Pap, I need you to get my some gems, candles, and chalk."

"YOU ACTUALLY PLAN ON TAKING AWAY THIS HUMAN'S HUMANITY?"

"Yes." He said, the white in his eye sockets disappearing. "Please, go get them." He gave Papyrus the paper. "... OH, ALL RIGHT." Papyrus left the house.

Sans look at the baby once more before carrying it upstairs. He went into his room.

Once inside, he made a small crib out of bones and placed Harry inside of it. "Who knows?" He chuckled to himself, tucking Harry's blankets tightly around him. "Maybe he'll make a great sidekick."

HPSPHPSP

Another chapter up! Also, the cover for this story is a drawing I made at school before posting this story. So now you know what Harry's gonna look like(He's on the right, by the way). :) It's also on Pinterest and Deviantart. See ya'll later!


	3. Chapter 1: Letter

I realized that I didn't put up a disclaimer, so... I don't own either of them. This is a time skip chapter and will be told from Harry's point of view.

Also, to answer Guest #3 in the reviews' question, yes.

On with the story!

Warning: Bad puns

HPSPHPSP

14 years later...

SPLAT! Mashed vegetables flew everywhere, and I wasn't amused. "Now I have to dig this mush out of my eye sockets..." I grumbled. "Looks like we're gonna have to eat on a-"

"SANS, NO."

"Vege-table."

"OH MY GOD!" Papyrus slapped his mush covered hands onto his skull, his eyes bulging in annoyance. I snickered at the image. I loved Pap's reactions to the puns just as much as I loved the puns. "Oh, cheer up, Pap. At least you made a good salsa, even though we don't have tortilla chips." I said, scooping up some of the mush with my finger and tasting it. Definitely salsa. "THEN I SHALL GO GET SOME!" Papyrus exclaimed, obviously happy to have his mush complimented. He ran out the door yelled over his shoulder, "I'LL BE BACK!"

I turned to Sans, who was already to work on scraping the mess into a large bowl. "Who taught Pap that that was cooking?"

"Undyne."

"Figures. She's so violent." I sigh. I went and got a spatula to help him. We managed to get it all into a bowl, other than the salsa in our sockets and his ribs. I put the bowl on the table. "Okay. Now what?" Sans shrugged. "I was thinking we could play a game, but we promised not to without Pap."

"Bro, no talking about the 'game' before eating. Last thing we need is aroused magics walking around the house staining everything."

"You know you like it, Han."

"But I don't like mess." Sans laughed. I like it when he laughs, it lights up the whole house. "I guess not."

I was about to start some small talk when Papyrus came back holding a family size bag of tortilla chips and a dead owl. "Since when did we start eating owls?" I asked. "NO, WE'RE NOT GONNA EAT IT. IT HAS A LETTER ADDRESSED TO YOU. THEY'RE USING YOUR HUMAN NAME." He gave me an envelope. It was addressed:

To: Harry Potter

Unknown

"If my address is unknown, how did it find me?" I wondered aloud as I pulled out two pieces of paper and read both of them. "WHAT DOES IT SAY?"

"That I'm enrolled to a magic school. Fuck that." I went to the living room and threw the papers in the fireplace. After a few minutes of watching it burn, Sans decided to break the silence. "So, how about that salsa?"

HPSPHPSP

meanwhile…

"Did the letter detect a destination." Albus Dumbledore asked his second-in-command Minerva McGonagall. "No. The charm disappeared, meaning the owl was killed or the charm deactivated." Albums cursed in his mind. They'd been looking for the Potter boy for four years and no luck. They had finally charmed an owl to detect where he was, as they're owls always knew where someone was on the earth. And now its gone! But, then again, it brought them a few steps closer to finding him. "Trace where the owl died, we might be able to find him in that area."

"I'm on it." Minerva said, tinkering with the magical instrument tied to the charm on the owl. Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as he left. Finally, his hard work won't go to waste.

HPSPHPSP

Another one up! Hope you enjoyed! Also, I don't think I'll make very good puns, by I'll try my best!


	4. Chapter 2: When They Arrive

Mr Guy: You should seriously stop writing.

... Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *inhales deeply* I only have two questions for you. If you don't like my writing, WHY are you here, and WHY would you review? If you don't like it, LEAVE! With no trace that you were here! Please and thank you.

Anyway, Guest #5, I really want to, but then again I wanna update as fast as I can. Also, I'm not that good at writing long chapters without adding too much. But, just to test myself, each chapter will have more words than the last one until I reach 3,000 words, okay? Tell me how I did, please!

Also, I've decided to give Harry a font name and it is... *drumroll done on my bedpost*

Lobster!

...

What? It's a nice font. Not better than zapfino, but that's too fancy.

Let us continue!

HPSPHPSP

The day went by with no other problems, other than the occasional wizard here and there. Even so, the wizards were Death Eaters and didn't even have a hint that Harry was still alive, until a certain spy report to his Lord. Then the Death Eaters knocked on their door. "Yeesss?" Sans said after he cracked the door open and poked his head out. He didn't like the way they looked or smelled. Their presence literally screamed "Dark Wizards!"

"Hello, sir. May we come in?" Sans paused and thought for a moment. 'Harry's not even recognizable to anyone! What am I worried about? But, then again, I shouldn't underestimate these wizards, more so Lord Voldemort if he is among them.' "Sure, come on in." He opened the door and the wizards inside.

They settled in the living room. "Would ya like something to drinks or..."

"That won't be necessary. Actually, we're looking for a lost boy. Black hair and green eyes. Have you seen anyone of that description?" One Death Eater, who had his hood up, handed him a picture. It was of a red-headed lady and a black-haired man. The lady had green eyes and the man had black. "These are his parents." Sans scratched his head. "Well, I can't help you here. I've never seen a boy who looks like either of these two. We're all skeletons here." Sans would have loved to make a pun, but he knew better. Death Eaters whispered among themselves and eyed Sans. The one that gave him the picture took it back and spoke again. "Very well. May I see who else lives here?"

"Of course." Sans made a motion that he would be right back and rushed upstairs. Luckily, Papyrus and Harry were in the same room, as always. "We have guests who want to see you two." Papyrus jumped up. "DO THEY MEAN HARM?"

"I don't think so, but we never know. I'm sure they won't mess with us, all they wanna do is make sure the boy they're looking for isn't here." Sans then made a few signs with his hands that translated to: "They put a listening spell on me, but they can't see us. Don't say anything out of turn."

"ALRIGHT, BROTHER! LET US MEET THEM!" Papyrus grabbed Harry, who was trying to complete a puzzle Papyrus gave him, by the hoodie and half dragged half pulled Harry out of the room. Sans followed silently and signed to Harry: "Remember, your name is Lobster. Our brother." Harry nodded. He had gotten used to switching his name between Lobster and Harry. He liked Lobster more anyway.

Downstairs, the guests had settled on the sofa. They were talking among themselves again. "Well," Sans exclaimed with a loud clap that startled one or two of the death eaters. "Here they are! My brothers, Papyrus and Lobster!"

"HELLO HUMANS!" Papyrus greeted them with great enthusiasm while Harry, or, for now, Lobster just waved. The Death Eater with his hood up pointed his wand at each of them in turn. Sans almost panicked when it lingered on Lobster a bit longer than it did on Papyrus and him. "Your brother is powerful." The Death Eater said, also making Sans let out a breath of relief. "Very powerful..." He mumbled as he lowered his wand. Lobster just raised an eyebrow at him before announcing that he was going to make dinner.

"Well, thank you for your time, Mister..."

"Just call me Sans." The Death Eater nodded and lead the rest of the group out of the house. Sans used magic to shut the door and lock it, placing up some necessary magic to make sure that there weren't any other magics around the house. He found a few spells on the furniture and walls and immediately destroyed them. "Well, now that that's over, what do you plan on cooking, Lobs?"

"Oh, so my nickname is now in full use, huh?" Lobster teased as he basically emptied the fridge onto the counter. Not that there was much in there anyway. "Yep, 'cause it suits , we have no idea if those guys in mask and robes will come back. We need to stay alert." Sans sat down on the couch, soon followed by Papyrus. "...Alright. And to answer you question, I'm making burgers and french fries, and I alright know what you want on it, Sans." He told him before heading back into kitchen.

HPSPHPSP

Annnd, another one up! Also, I forgot to mention, Sakura, we'll go into more detail on what happened to Lily next chapter, 'kay? Another thing, to Guest #5, a picture of Harry and his powers is on my deviantart. The link is on my profile. I hope it helps! Bye!


	5. Forum

Hello, everyone! This isn't a chapter, but don't worry! I'm working on it! I just wanna put out a poll real quick. I wanna know if you would like a 'If Lobster Was Canon' forum? I've planned it out. Tell me in the reviews or PM me.

Also, Magical Girl Powpow, thanks for pointing that out. Thats how I want this story to be. To be honest, I don't really plan where this story is going. I work from where I left off and think up stuff as I go. I want parts to be reveled as the story goes on, that's why I left out some stuff. I hope this satisfies you, if not then PM me I guess.

The next chapter should be up soon, and there more words. I'm hoping to reach 2,000 at this rate. Thanks!


	6. Chapter 3: Moving

Hello! Next Chapter! Just a quit warning though this chapter contains Malfoy!bashing. But, on the bright side, Harry's gonna use magic! I'm not spoiling anything else! Also putting out a lemon warning. No likey no viewy!

HPSPHPSP

Sans and Papyrus decided that they couldn't keep Harry away from the wizarding community forever. It was a big risk, but it'd be worth it. Besides, they needed to move somewhere before those wizards who wanted to control Harry found them, if the magic Sans found on that owl was anything to go by. They manage to pack up the house without Harry noticing and pick out a destination. They told Harry about the move a few hours later. "Wow. Our first move in the human world. You said something about Knockturn Alley?"

"Yep. That's where we're going. It's so creepy and dark there that we won't bring ourselves too much attention. I don't want you socializing with any of the wizards there. Last thing we need is someone to trick you into doing or taking something dangerous. And just for precautions we'll be using your nickname from now on." Harry nodded in acknowledgement. "I understand."

Papyrus gathered all their bags while Sans created a portal to their destination. They all held onto each other as they jumped through.

HPSPHPSP

They landed in a hotel. It was old and slightly dusty, but it showed the effort they people who owned the place put into trying to clean it. "No one comes here anymore. It's a good place to stay unnoticed in." Sans said smirking. Harry excitedly ran up to the counter and rung the bell like the people in the many T.V. shows he watched.

A young woman hurried out of the back room and forced a cringe worthy smile onto her face. "Welcome to the Dennis Moore Inn, how may I help you?"

"WE WOULD LIKE A SUITE FOR THREE PLEASE!" Papyrus exclaimed throwing a handful of galleons onto the counter. The woman's eyes widened at the pile of gold in front of her. "Would you like me to escort you to your room?" She asked, much more politely this time. "Nah, just give us the number and we'll settle down." The woman nodded and went to retrieve a key as fast as possible.

"It reeks of Dark in here." Harry grumbled, fanning the air in front of him. "I know. I personally like this smell more. It makes us wary and alert, when the Light disguises it's secrets with a more calming aura. Light is more dangerous." Harry stared in slight fascination as Sans' eyes lost their white dots. He's rarely seen Sans like this before that letter came, even when the human was around.

No, scratch that, that human was trouble with it's RESETs and SAVEs. He experienced his brothers' and friends' deaths many times over and over because of them. Because a part of him was still human, no matter how many times the human RESET it didn't effect him. He knew what the human did, and he discussed it with Sans, who was aware of the RESETs, but not the SAVEs. After the human liberated all the monsters he managed to override the humans' DETERMINATION. He doesn't know how, but now he can SAVE and RESET at will. He promised to never RESET unless there was absolutely no other option, but he SAVES now and again, whenever he feels that his brothers are in danger.

Sans and Papyrus watched Harry's eyes go completely green as he suddenly smacked the air. Sans has seen this happen many times before, mostly when Papyrus and him went to places where he couldn't follow. He suspected that he was doing something to make sure nothing happened to them, but he had no other clues. Maybe he'd ask about it?

The woman came back and handed a key with the number 369 on it to Sans. "300s are on the fifth floor. Please enjoy your stay." She quickly bowed and went back into the backroom.

As soon as she left they made their way up to the fifth floor. Their room was at the end of the corridor. Upon entering they were greeted with the sight of a beautifully decorated living room with five doors along a wall to the right. "At least they take care of their shit." Harry whispered trying to avoid another lecture about proper language from Papyrus.

They parted ways to explore the suite, Papyrus to the kitchen, Sans to the bedrooms, and Harry to the patio (A/n: It's upstairs. I don't even know if I got it right, I forgot what it's called. I'll put it when I find out)

Harry glanced at the two pieces of furniture and potted plants that decorated it before looking down below at the people buzzing about running their errands and such. Then a small group of people caught his eye.

It was a family of bleach-haired rich people, if their appearance was anything to go by. A mother, father, and son. The son had stopped his father and pointed at him. They stayed where they were and talked for a while. The father casted a spell that sent a wisp of light up to him. The light spoke. "Hello, young child. My son found you interesting and we decided to meet with you and your guardians if you have any."

"Really? No asking for permission? Rude." Harry sneered glancing down once more to find that the family was already gone. A few minutes later he heard a knock on the main door and Papyrus yell "WHO IS IT?" When he got back into the living room the family was already inside.

"Good afternoon, Mr...?"

"I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS!"

"... Right, I'm sure you are." The father of the family said with clear sarcasm. Harry felt he wouldn't like this family and the angry magic behind him told him that Sans won't either. "Who are you anyway?" Sans asked with forced calmness. The Malfoys looked at him as though he was being rude, but introduced themselves nonetheless. "I am Lucius Malfoy. This is my wife, Narcissa, and my son, Draco." Harry and Sans nodded to each of them in turn as their names were said. Papyrus just violently waved.

The Draco boy walked up to Harry and offered his hand. Harry took it and felt some kinda of dark magic pulling at him. He immediately let go of his hand and gave Sans a look. Sans signed, 'He tried to teleport you somewhere, didn't he?' Harry signed a quick 'yes' before turning back to the Malfoys. They looked shocked. "Well, I think its time for you to leave now."

"What!? How did the portkey not work!? Tell me!" Draco yelled. Harry just smiled. "Magic. Now, get out-'" Harry summoned a giant lobster claw, inside of which was a glowing, AK curse green orb that was getting larger and larger by the second. "-before I make you."

The Malfoys somehow didn't get the hint and pulled out their wands. Harry shook his head and snapped his fingers. The orb in the claw bursted and the sides of the claw directed the orb's power toward the Malfoys. Lucius put up a shield but it was no use. They got blasted through the hotel until they landed in the hotel's dumpster. Sans quickly repaired all of the damage before anyone noticed it.

"I was wondering if you've been practicing, Lobs." Sans chuckled. "Glad you didn't CLAW their eyes out."

"One, that pun was horrible, and two, of course I've been practicing. I've been living with Papyrus and his everyday motto is PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT!'." Harry said summoning a bone and spinning it around on his index finger.

Sans chuckled and went back into the bedroom he came out of.

"I'M GLAD YOU TOOK MY ADVICE, LOBS!" Papyrus exclaimed throwing himself onto Harry. They fell onto the couch. "Pap…" Harry whispered. He was very aware of the fact that Papyrus was sitting on his lap and it was making the room seem a little hotter from his perspective. Papyrus noticed this and grinned. "YOU KNOW, IT'S BEEN AWHILE SINCE WE'VE PLAYED THE GAME."

"There's been a lot of problems recently, Pap." Harry squirmed from under Papyrus to let his magic form his penis and watched as Papyrus did the same. "Do you wanna be on top this time?" Papyrus nodded excitedly. He positioned himself between Harry's legs as Harry formed a vagina under his dick. Their shorts were ripped to shreds.

"YOU DON'T WANT TO FOREPLAY?" Harry shook his head and positioned Papyrus' dick at his entrance. "Nah. We might not get another chance to do this, so why wait?" He grabbed onto Papyrus' hips and pushed him forward, biting his lip when his dick pierced through his opening. He let Papyrus slid the rest of the way in. "Pap~…"He moaned. "C-CAN I MOVE?"

"Mmm… Pap, you know this stopped hurting a long time ago…"

"THAT D-DOESN'T STOP ME FROM WORRYING, LOB-LOBSTER."

"I know, but ease up a little, 'Kay?"

"I'LL TRY…" Papyrus took a deep breath and started to move. Harry couldn't help but whine a little. Papyrus always starts out slow, it drives him mad! He began to grind into Papyrus' cock in an attempt to get him to go faster. It worked, like it always does.

Soon enough they were moving at an inhumane pace, completely blinded by the ecstasy of it all. So blinded that they didn't noticed Sans reenter the room with a video camera and his dick in his hand.

"LOBSTER! I'M GETTING CLOSE!"

"M-Me too…!" Harry wrapped his arms around Papyrus' neck and slid his tongue against Papyrus' teeth. Papyrus let his own tongue form and twisted it around Harry's. A small tongue battle took place as they orgasms washed over them.

The mess was epic. There was slime everywhere. The couch, the ceiling, the walls, the doors. After getting down from their high they noticed a lot of blue slime splattered here and there. "Sans! How long have you been watching?" San chuckled making both boys turn towards him and glare. "Half way through." He answered hiding his camera behind his back. "Anyways, let's worry about the mess tomorrow. It's getting late. Plus, I got a new bedtime story~."

"YAY!" Papyrus yelled dragged Harry off the couch and into one of the bedrooms. Sans smiled and followed them inside. It was moments like this when he wished he could forget the past and look into a bright future with his family. Little did he know that Harry was thinking the same thing.

HPSPHPSP

1,740 words. I'm not too proud but hey its something. I hope you enjoyed and please check out the Poll chapter if you haven't already. Also, I've decided to make Lobster a separate OC outside of this story. I might make a song and voice for him one day, if I get the chance. If not, I might just ask someone for it :p. I also might write a tumblr for him. Who knows… Bye!


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